From Russia with Love
by MystWords
Summary: Karmy AU. What happens when Karma and Amy have an instant attraction? But there's a problem, a big problem: Amy's getting married and Amy can't like girls...Can she? Inspired by a myriad of things. I hope you enjoy it. F/F
1. AN

**Merry Christmas everyone!**

**I've have this new Karmy story to post as a sort of Christmas present for you all. It's inspired a little bit by what's going on in Russia at the moment, a little bit by the movie **_**I Can't Think Straight**_**, a little bit by my music play list and whole lot because of Karma and Amy.**

**It'll be pretty short, maybe four or five chapters but it's pretty fun to write so far.**

**I hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think.**

**Have a good Christmas if you celebrate it and if you don't, have a good day.**

**A**

**P.S. Disclaimer: Obviously certain characters and things do not belong to me. Also, a couple of the ideas (i.e. Tennis playing) where inspired by scenes in _I Can't Think Straight._**


	2. Chapter 1: Unthinkable

_"In 1936 the world attended the Olympics in Germany. Few participants said a word about Hitler's campaign against the Jews. Supporters of that decision point proudly to the triumph of Jesse Owens, while I point with dread to the Holocaust and world war. There is a price for tolerating intolerance." – Harvey Fierstein_

It's a sweltering, exhausting summer's evening in Texas when Liam decides that his latest girlfriend, the one that's lasted longer than a month, should meet his close friend visiting from God knows where.

She blasts the air conditioning on high and closes her eyes. She smiles as the sun beats down on her skin and imagines she can taste, she can smell the summer warmth as she inhales.

"Amy's getting married soon pretty soon. I went to her engagement party last week in Russia. She's coming over for a few weeks to get away, I think. Her mom's pretty annoying, especially with all this wedding planning."

"How long have you guys known each other?"

"Years. Her parents are friends with mine. I think they wanted us to get together but we're cool." He turns to face her. "We're just friends, y'know?"

"Well, she is getting married to somebody else, right?" He laughs.

"Yeah, yeah, she is. We met in England when we were kids." She looks at him and takes in his jaw line, his soft skin, his dark hair and smiles. He's a nice guy. One day she _will_ fall in love with him, even if it takes her years to do so.

"Do you miss it?"

"Miss what? England? Sometimes. It's very different, y'know? But I like it here. I can't wait to show Amy what it's like." He pulls up at some fancy looking building. This is life when you come from money, she's learning.

She squirms, pulls on her sleeves and brushes a hand through her red locks. The heat seeps all of the moisture out of her skin until she's sweating within minutes of stepping out of the car. Her stomach lands at her feet now that they've arrived. This world, his world is so different from her own, homely one.

She doesn't know how, she doesn't know if she could fit in but she'll try. Her father asked her to and she never wants to let him down.

Liam reaches for her hand and she wants to pull it away, to wipe the moisture from her skin but he keeps a hold and walks off towards the house of a thousand rooms. She rolls her eyes and prays she won't get lost in this labyrinth of a home.

If Amy's never even been to Texas, how does she even own it? That's the thought running through her mind when they wait at the door for somebody to answer. Or does her family? Perhaps they'll have a British butler, too and Liam can bond with him about home and how crappy the weather is there.

And besides, if they don't even own it, why would they rent such a big place for a few weeks? It seems like a waste of money to her but sure enough, a butler appears at the door.

Oh, how the other half live.

She wouldn't know. She's never left this southern town that's something akin to hell. That's the one thing about Liam, she knows at some point, he'll take her somewhere. He'll take her away from gossiping old women that judge and judge and judge and the oppressive heat that chokes you more and more each year. And she will learn to love such a funny, caring guy.

She has to.

"Hello, Geoffrey."

"Good afternoon, Liam." And sure enough, he's British.

"This is Karma. We're here to see Amy."

"Of course, of course. Follow me. She's just in the living room." And so they do. They follow and Karma tries to take everything in but it's all too much. The richly painted walls, the expensive looking vases and pictures, the large chandeliers that pop up in some rooms she gets a glimpse of.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine." She squeezes his hand and smiles to reassure him. He smiles back and continues following.

"Amy." He let's go of Karma's hand and opens his arms wide. She sees nothing but a mess of blonde hair poking out over Liam's shoulder until Liam steps aside.

"Amy, this is Karma. Karma, this is Amy." For a few moments, they stand there, taking each other in. Karma notices the strong jaw, the vibrant green eyes that make her think of travelling and the world and the exotic. She's never seen anything like it. Amy's exquisite and Liam is a fool for not wanting her, she thinks.

Similarly, Amy stands there, shocked for a few moments. Liam usually goes for the blonde, money-grabbing kind of girl to get his kicks with for a little while. Not this, not this beauty. This beauty that has her hand extended towards Amy.

"It's nice to meet you," Karma says, shaking Amy's hand. Amy pulls her close and inhales the musky smell of outside, of Texas, of nature which smells so good on her.

"A friend of Liam's is a friend of mine," she says, reluctantly letting the little Red beauty go after kissing Karma on each side of her face. When she pulls away, she notices a slight red hue on Karma's cheeks and throws a smirk in her direction until Amy's knees go weak.

The way Karma looks up from under her eyelashes, the slight blush that could be from embarrassment or from another, much more physical source creates a dull ache that pulses between her thighs. She turns away to sit down and compose herself for a moment. She should not be thinking of Liam's girlfriend like that. Hell, she shouldn't be thinking of girls like that in general. Her parents, her family would kill her if they knew.

They sit next to each other with adequate distance between them. Liam sits on a chair to Karma's left.

"So, I hear a congratulations are in order."

"Well, it's either a congratulations or an apology." Karma frowns and Liam smirks.

"Excuse me?"

"What Amy means is, it's either a good thing she's getting married or a very bad thing. Not the best time to make jokes, eh?" Liam winks at Amy. They all laugh, Karma not very believably before Amy clears her throat.

"So, what're you doing this evening?" Karma turns her head towards the girl to listen discreetly to Liam and Amy's conversation. Karma loves the slight Russian lilt to her words, the way her voice seems so regal and strong and decisive.

"Well, me and Karma are going to dinner in a few hours or so," he says after looking at his much too expensive watch. "You're welcome to join us."

"Oh, I don't want to impose or anything."

"You won't be. Will she, Karma?"

"Of course not. As Liam said, you're welcome to join us." Karma smiles and Amy has the distinct urge to lick and kiss and taste the dimple in her cheek, her smile. Amy smiles back and nods her head in agreement. She needs a few moments to compose herself, to lock away the thoughts this firecracker conjures up.

"So, how's Shane?"

"He's good," Amy says, nodding her head.

"Shane's the groom, the lucky man."

"Oh."

"He's busy working, I think. Mama's busy with the wedding and I'm here, trying to escape." Again, they all laugh but Karma wonders how happy this marriage will be if Amy's jokes are any indication. Shouldn't she be excited, be planning along with her mother? Shouldn't she have butterflies in her stomach at the thought of marrying the love of her life, butterflies reminiscent of the ones in Karma's stomach now as Amy smiles at her? Karma's never seen such a soft, vivid hue of green. She's just blindsided by a kind of beauty she's never seen before, that's why her hands are sweaty, that's why her eyes can't stop soaking in Amy's form.

At least, that's what she tells herself.

She's no stranger to admitting the objective beauty of men and women alike. There's no denying how handsome and beautiful Liam is but she's never felt attraction, never felt the _need_ for another person and at 25, she's stopped believe in love at first sight. Hell, she only just about believes in lust at first sight, even if, realistically, she could be feeling it right now.

But that's the thing about feelings, they're so subjective and so Karma takes a deep breath and tries to join in the conversation for the rest of the night, the conversation that doesn't register because Karma's never seen flesh quite so soft, quite so perfect looking.

She's at the restaurant, quietly listening to Amy and Liam catch up and trying not to think about how beautiful Amy's body is. Or that smirk, that smirk that's so sexy and so objectively attractive that Karma knows she's not attracted to her, right? She's just human.

"So, little one. What do you do?" Amy asks after Liam has excused himself to take a phone call. Karma jumps and tries to formulate a response as Amy looks across the table at her.

"I'm a-Wait. Little one? I'm not little, I'm perfect." Amy smirks behind the wine glass and winks at her.

"Perfect?" She looks Karma up and down. "That you are. Now you didn't answer my question." Karma blushes under the look Amy gives her. The one with the eyebrow raised, the head tilted and a lip quirked. She wants to touch those lips, to feel the softness of Amy all over her. Her brain short circuits for a moment before she chases the thoughts away.

"Teacher," she shouts a little too loud, a little too high pitched to hide her nervousness. "I mean, I'm a teacher. I teach people-I mean children."

"Hmm, that's usually what teachers do, no? You like it?"

"It's good-It's nice. Especially when you get to see little children light up when they learn something." Light up like Karma does now. Amy tilts her head a little more and the smirk turns to a smile. She places the wineglass down.

"So it's your passion? To teach, I mean?" Her eyes lock intently onto Karma and Karma squirms under the attention.

"Not really. I mean, kind of?" Amy frowns. "Music is my passion, that's what I love to do the most but I love teaching, too." She shrugs and Amy nods her head.

"Music? Do you sing?"

"Yeah. I play a couple instruments, too." Karma looks down and tries not to blush. She wipes her hands, discreetly on her floral skirt.

"So why not do that? Why teach?"

"Because." Karma shrugs.

"Because?"

"Because I teach, that's what I do."

"Can I hear you sing sometime?"

"Maybe." Karma smirks. "Depends."

"On?"

"If you make it worth my while." Karma freezes, only just realising how that sounds. "I mean-I, er—"

"What are you guys talking about?" They both jump as Liam re-joins them at the table, sitting to the side of them both.

"Teaching," Karma says, throwing Amy a look. Amy quirks an eyebrow in response and takes a sip of her drink.

Karma berates herself for sharing her musical inclination with Amy. She usually doesn't like people knowing and certainly doesn't want Liam, too. She knows he'll ask her to play and that's something she doesn't want. Hardly anyone knows that she can sing, that she can play guitar and a myriad of other instruments. Not even her parents, her parents who paid for her lessons but where much too busy for her, knew.

Liam frowns.

"Oh."

"Yeah, I was just asking what Karma does."

"And what do you do?" Karma asks.

"Well Amy here's recently opened a company back in Russia. You're planning on moving it here, right?" Karma frowns at Liam and wonders why he keeps answering on behalf of Amy.

"Yes." Amy turns and tries to give Liam her full attention but fails. Karma is in her peripheral vision and she can't help but watch the way she brushes her hair back behind her ear, the way she keeps throwing looks Amy's way, the way her lips caress the wine glass and Amy wishes, wishes she could feel Karma's mouth on her own. "Shane wants to move back here and it'll be better for my company."

"Of course, of course. Are you excited?"

"About the future? Yes, there's a lot going on."

"Yeah, I suppose there is with the wedding and all." She nods her head.

"So, Karma, how do you feel about Tennis?" she asks.

"I'm er-I'm not much of a sports person."

"Me, Amy and a mutual friend are going to play a few games tomorrow." He places his elbows on the table and Karma tries not to show her annoyance. "Do you want to join us so we can have even teams? You and Amy can play against each other. She's an amazing player, the next Maria Sharapova." Amy bows her head. "She can teach you a thing or two." She scoffs and Karma looks at her.

"I'm sure you can, Princess but won't it be boring for you? I'm really, really bad at sport." Amy shrugs.

"I'm sure I could teach you something." She winks and Liam doesn't notice, he's watching Karma. Karma who's trying – and failing – not to squirm and blush. Liam frowns and turns to Amy with a questioning look on his face. She shrugs and nods her head in Karma's direction. "It'll be fun, I promise."

"Yeah, it'll be fun. C'mon, Karms." Amy smiles and Karma can't resist those green eyes and so she nods and accepts her fate. Tomorrow, she'll be playing tennis and embarrassing herself in front of a beautiful, exotic creation of a woman.

"Great," she says, rising from her chair. "So, I should get some beauty sleep." Karma scoffs, Amy smirks. "I'll see you both in the morning."

"We'll see you in the morning," Liam says, rising and hugging her. She walks around to Karma and pulls her close, kissing both cheeks and coming dangerously close to the edge of her lips.

"I'll see you soon, sweet girl," she whispers. Karma looks down, hiding a small smile.

"I'll see you tomorrow. It was nice meeting you, Amy."

"The pleasure was all mine." She squeezes Karma's hand as she walks past.

"So, should we head home?" Liam asks.

"Sure." They both walk out and Karma looks around for Amy, failing to see her. Liam keeps her hand locked in his and she wants to pull it away, her flesh itches to do so but she doesn't and he doesn't let go.

Even in the car, he keeps touching some part of her as often as he can and she knows what's coming, or rather who's going to be coming by the end of the night and she wish she could leave, could tell him no and walk away but he's too nice and she needs him. She needs him to make her happy, to make her not so objective feelings towards women fade away.

Her parents, her mother would hate her. She can't do it to them, can't bring herself to hurt them all she has to do is get over it, get over these physical urges she has for a woman she's only just met. If she's never been attracted to another female in 25 years then it's just a fluke, right? Never mind the fact she's never really been attracted to anyone in her 25 years of existence.

That's how she ends up on her back with Liam on top of her, plunging in and out of her with her thoughts on Amy. Amy, Liam's close friend that turns Karma on more than anyone else ever has and she doesn't even know her, not really.

But that doesn't stop Karma, doesn't stop Karma from imagining it's Amy above her and when she does, the weight on top of her turns from oppressive to delicious. She imagines the way Amy's curves would slide against her sweat slicked flesh and feels the pressure building in her stomach.

She imagines it's her lips, not Liam's that are kissing from her mouth, across her jaw and down her neck to her chest. She imagines that it's Amy's mouth that's greedily licking and sucking and biting her breasts and suddenly it goes from hurting to sending pulsing shocks between her thighs.

Liam groans and the magic's lost. He plunges in a couple more times before pulling out and rolling away. Karma feels emptier, dirtier than ever. She shouldn't have done that, shouldn't have been thinking about _her_ but she was. And it felt good.

"You good?" he asks.

"Yeah." Karma nods and rolls over, her back facing Liam who climbs out of the bed and begins getting dressed.

"I'll pick you up around 9, okay?"

"Okay." He walks over and kisses her on the mouth.

"Night."

"Night." She lies there, facing the darkness and wondering what's going on. Why does she feel like this? Why she does want _her_ and not _him?_

Unbeknownst to Karma, Amy is lying awake thinking of her. The way her red hair looks so soft, is so soft when it brushes against Amy's cheek, the way her lips look so kissable all the time, the way her blush is the cutest thing Amy's ever seen.

That's who she's thinking about as her hand sneaks below her waist and under her panties. She moves in and out, in and out and imagines Karma is above her, thrusting her fingers deep inside and whispering in her ear.

"You're so beautiful," imaginary Karma whispers. "I love fucking you." And her fingers hit the spot just right, sending shocks through her body that keep building and building the more she hits it. "And, God, you taste so good." Amy imagines her kissing her, kissing her and swallowing the moans and groans that erupt from her throat as the shocks explode and all Amy can see is herface until she's left alone in darkness.

She's never cum so hard, so fast and it's all because of the red beauty she cannot have.

Karma has Liam, good, funny, friendly Liam and Amy has Shane. Shane whom she loves, loves but not like _that_. And he doesn't love her like that, either. In six weeks, they'll be trapped in loveless marriage that only has room for platonic feelings.

Shane needs Amy to cover for his family, Amy needs him to cover for her. If only she wasn't born in Russia, if only her family wouldn't hate her, if only she met Karma first and then she could stop repressing herself, holding herself back.

She doesn't believe in love at first sight but she knows, she knows she could feel something for Karma if given the chance but she can't do it, can't hurt Liam, can't hurt Shane, can't ruin her life.

And so she has a restless night of tossing and turning. In the morning, she dresses and curses herself for having butterflies in her stomach as the time to meet Karma comes closer and closer until she's there, in front her. A tight white shirt and skirt clinging to her skin, emphasising her curves, her curves that Amy wants to reach out and grab and press into herself.

"Hey."

"Good Morning."

"Hello, Aims." Liam walks ahead of Karma and hugs Amy first. "Me and Oliver are gonna play a few sets. We'll meet you later for lunch, okay?"

"Okay," Amy says, reaching for Karma with one arm and hugging her.

"How'd your beauty sleep go?" Karma says after Liam walks off.

"I could've done with some more but I see you got enough sleep for your beauty." Amy winks and Karma laughs and looks away. "C'mon, Lastochka, let's play some tennis." Amy loops her arm through Karma's and pulls her towards the courts. "You know how to serve?" Karma nods her head and Amy walks to the other side of the court.

Karma grunts as she throws the ball in the air and hits it with her racket. It hits the net. Amy smirks and holds the racket down so she can lean against it. Karma narrows her eyes and tries again. The ball goes over the net, Amy hits it back and Karma runs, stretches as far as her body can take her and hits it. Amy misses the return, distracted by the strip of flesh that became visible as Karma stretched. Her mouth almost watered at the sight.

"I thought you were the next Maria Sharapova?" Karma shouts. Amy's lip quirks upwards and she chuckles.

"Just wait and see little love."

And Karma does see. Liam really was right, Amy's an amazing player who won every single set but Karma thinks it slightly unfair, unfair because Karma is so not a sports person.

"Good game," Amy says, walking to the net and shaking Karma's hand. Karma scoffs.

"I suck but thanks for trying to make me feel better." Amy laughs and touches her arm.

"You were pretty good. Especially for a lazy, non-sports person."

"Lazy? Who said I was lazy."

"I did." Amy winks. "Now c'mon, showers are this way." She pulls on Karma's hand and Karma obediently follows. She watches the way Amy's hips rotate and licks her lips. The sheen of sweat on her skin makes Amy's skin look even softer.

"So what's it like? Russia, I mean," Karma says in the changing rooms as she wipes her face with a towel. She'd never admit it but Amy was right, she is pretty lazy and the heavy breathing throughout told Karma she needs to exercise more.

"It's nice. It's different, a lot different. I like it here, though. It's warmer, more accepting. Why do ask? Planning on visiting?" Karma scoffs.

"I'd have to actually get out of this town for that but no, I was just wondering what it was like. Don't you miss home?"

"Not really. And me and Shane will be moving her soon enough." Amy shrugs. "Do you want to travel anywhere?"

"Yes, everywhere. I want to go away and learn new things, see new cultures, y'know?" Amy nods.

"That's…admirable of you but don't you want to settle somewhere?" Karma laughs.

"No, I'm just 25, I have time to settle down."

"I'm 26 and getting married."

"But that's you, not me. If you want to do that, then I'm happy for you but it's not the kind of life I want to lead."

"So you'll travel, you'll follow that passion but you won't share your music with the world?" They're standing opposite each other, both with frowns in place.

"That's-that's different."

"How so."

"It just is." Karma turns to put the towel in the basket and gets her fingers caught as the wood closes on her fingers. "Ouch."

"What's wrong?" Amy grabs her hand and pulls it close. "It looks okay." She rubs Karma's fingers with her thumb and looks her in the eyes. "You'll live." Her voice softens to a throaty whisper. Karma stands frozen between wanting to look into green for the rest of her life and pulling away, pulling away from the engaged woman in front of her.

"Are you looking forward to your wedding?" The moment ends and Amy lets go of Karma's hand.

"I guess." Karma quirks an eyebrow. "Things aren't as simple they seem. But, golubushka, will you promise me something?"

"What's that?"

"Do what makes you happy." Karma nods her head and the crease in her brow deepens. Amy smiles but her eyes look a little duller, a little more sad than usual. Amy rubs her necklace, a gold heart shaped one and Karma thinks it suits her, somehow it's not too feminine or masculine for her. "C'mon, showers are just through there. We better get ready for lunch."

"Okay, I'll be out soon." Karma walks off.

It's hard, Amy thinks. It's hard to be in a shower stall right next to a beautiful girl, a beautiful girl she wants that's showering and naked and wet right next to her. She rests her forehead on the tiles and wishes, wishes she could have her, wish she wasn't so trapped by her culture, her home, her family.

She cries, quietly. She cries and cries for everything she know she can never have. That girl in high school that she lost through fear, the one that's no longer alive at all, the one who's next to her right now.

And Shane. Shane who loves men like Amy loves women. Shane whose staunchly Catholic parents would never allow him to live life like he wants too. Shane who's just as trapped as Amy. She decides to call him later, fill him in on everything that's happened since yesterday afternoon. Yesterday afternoon that seems so long ago.

"Are you okay?" Karma asks as Amy walks into the changing rooms. She freezes when she notices Amy's only wrapped in a towel. "You took a while." Karma tries to look away but her eyes are drawn to Amy, drawn to the way rivulets of water drip down the valley between Amy's breasts, down her lightly freckled shoulder, down her neck.

"Yeah. That shower was nice, refreshing." Karma nods her head in agreement. She bites her lip and turns away, continuing getting dressed and trying to put the thoughts of a naked Amy out of her head.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes." But she isn't. Amy's dressed in nothing but her dark red panties and bra and Karma is almost salivating at the sight. Amy's abs poke out each time she takes a breath, her legs are long and toned and look so edible and her face, her face with that smirk just does something unexplainable to Karma. Well, maybe not that unexplainable if the wetness pooling just below Karma's waist is anything to go by.

"I'll er, I'll wait for you." Karma points behind her. "Outside, I'll wait." She walks out and tries to rid her mind of the sight of a beautiful and almost naked Goddess. She takes deep breathes and closes her eyes. She shouldn't be thinking this, she shouldn't be wanting her when Liam is just there, just there and walking towards her with who Karma assumes is Oliver beside him.

"Hey, we were just looking for you guys." He kisses Karma's lips. "Where's Amy."

"Amy's here," she says, appearing from nowhere. She looks tense and stands a little straighter. The way she frowns and looks less than happy doesn't suit her, Karma thinks.

"Good. We're starving, aren't we Ol?" Oliver nods his head and adjusts his glasses.

"Yes-yes we've worked up quite an appetite."

"Yeah, well. You know Amy and this is Karma. Karma, this is Oliver and old friend of mine and Amy's."

"It's nice to meet you," he says and they shake hands.

"Likewise."

"So, where would you ladies like to go to eat?" Karma shrugs.

"Wherever."

"Why don't we just eat here since we're here already?" Amy suggests and everyone agrees. "They do the best Pelmeni here, you should try some," Amy whispers into Karma's ear. Karma turns to face her.

"Is it Russian?"

"Yes."

"I'd love to eat some Russian," Karma says winking and for once, Amy's the one to lightly blush. Karma laughs softly and pulls on her hand. "C'mon you. Let's go eat."

Liam and Oliver are walking ahead and stop to wait for them for a moment. "Sorry," Karma mutters like a naughty school girl getting told off.

"It's okay." Liam steps between Karma and Amy and holds his elbows out for them to each hold onto his arms. Amy rolls her eyes and Karma wishes he'd stop interrupting. Even though he's her boyfriend, she'd rather talk and just be with Amy.

Karma knows they won't last, Amy is proof of that but she wishes she could be brave, could upset her family and leave Liam for Amy. Even if Karma thinks Amy hasn't so much as hinted at wanting her. Even if Karma thinks it's stupid and near impossible to want someone so much after a short amount of time. Even if Karma refuses to fully accept the infatuation she's feeling, a part of her knows, knows Amy could be special, even if all they have now is friendship, she won't let her go.

Oliver quietly walks beside Amy. Amy likes him for that. He doesn't need to fill the silence, doesn't need to always be doing and talking and interrupting. He can just be.

They sit at their table and order. Karma gets the Pelmeni and Amy orders a sandwich. A sandwich which forces her to make the most delicious sounds Karma's ever heard. Amy moans.

"Taste this." Karma takes a bite a moans, equally as enthused as Amy at the taste.

"That's delicious. You were right about this, by the way," she says, pointing to her plate. "Absolutely delicious. You want one?" Amy nods and Karma holds the dough covered morsel to Amy's lips, Amy's lips that lightly brush her fingers and God, her tongue, her tongue which lightly strokes one of Karma's digits.

Luckily, Liam and Oliver are engaged in a conversation and miss the sensuous scene unfolding before them. Amy and Karma are locked in a moment, a moment which forces their hearts to jack hammer at unspeakable speeds.

"When are you going back to Russia?" Liam asks and both women jump. "They're both so jumpy." Both men laugh and Amy joins in. Karma looks away for a moment, trying to forget Amy's impending nuptials.

"16 days of freedom left." Everyone laughs but only Karma hears how hollow, how empty Amy's laugh is and she remembers, she remembers the _'things aren't as simple they seem' _Amy had thrown her way earlier.

Under the table, Karma places her hand on Amy's thigh and strokes it with her thumb, trying to comfort her. She smiles and Amy looks at her for a moment before doing the same and smiling back.

"I've met Shane. He's a nice guy."

"Yeah, he's a good man. A kind man."

"I hope to meet him one day," quiet Oliver says and Amy smiles softly at him. He'd be the perfect man, the perfect temperament for Shane. Too bad Amy has to marry Shane instead.

"I hope you do, too. I'm sure you'll like him."

"So, what're your plans?" Liam asks.

"I was going to head down to the coast for a few days, next week if any of you would like to join me? We have that beach house in Houston, still."

"Aims, I'd love to but I'm busy working all of next week. Karma's free though."

"I'm busy, too. Sorry Amy," Oliver says, shrugging. Everyone turns to Karma who squirms under the attention. Amy's torn. She hopes Karma agrees to go at the same time she hopes she doesn't. Karma's in a similar predicament.

"Hey, Karms. It'll be a brilliant trip away for a few days. I've seen the beach house and the beach, both are stunning," Liam encourages. Both women know he's dying for them to get along and they do, perhaps a little too well for his liking. Karma swallows her nerves.

"Oh, okay. That sounds lovely, thank you for inviting me."

"You don't-you don't have to come if you don't want to." Karma looks at her and watches the way she plays with her necklace and her leg shakes under Karma's hand, her hand squeezes and she nods.

"I know but I want to. It'll be nice to travel somewhere, right?"

"Right," Liam says but Karma ignores him, waiting for Amy's sign that this is okay, that she wants Karma to go. The smile Karma gets tells her enough.

"I'll look forward to it, blondie." Amy scoffs. Oliver looks between them both, frown in place and watches, watches the way they look at each other, the way they act with each other and he sees. He sees what everyone else hasn't.

They'd be perfect for each other, given the chance.

He grimaces and throws a sympathetic smile towards them both. Oliver knows numbers better than he knows people so when there are studies on people, he reads them for anthropological research. He knows that almost 75% of Russian's think homosexuality is wrong, he knows that if Amy wants to keep her family, wants to home to Russia that she can't be attracted to women.

Even if she is.

Amy looks away from him, hiding her face behind her blonde hair. He's never seen her do that before and Karma, Karma looks at him confused and with a hint of shame, he thinks.

He looks down and tries to wipe the sympathetic thoughts away, tries to re-arrange his face into a neutral expression (and succeeds).

Liam is still talking about this and that and nobody else is listening, not with the revelation that's just shook the table.

"So how did you two meet?" Oliver says after a few awkward moments, pushing his glasses a little higher up on his nose.

"My dad left something at home and asked me to drop it in at his office."

"Yeah. Her dad works for mine. I kept seeing her around and after the hundredth time of asking her out, she finally agreed." Liam shrugs. "And here we are." Amy fidgets and Karma moves her hand away, aware that they shouldn't be doing this. At least not until she's spoken to Liam.

She certainly can't stay with him now. Not now she knows what attraction really feels like. She knows her parents won't be happy, her mother will be furious but she can't do it any longer. She knows she can't have Amy either but she's sure, she's positive that she'll find someone. She has to, right?

Amy feels colder now Karma's hand isn't on her thigh. She wants her to put it back at the same time she doesn't. Meeting Karma has become a bittersweet experience she knows will end in pain. Amy already likes her too much.

And that's what she finds herself explaining to her best friend, her fiancée, Shane.

"She's so cute."

"So you like her?" Amy sighs through the phone. She's sitting on her bed, curled on her side and a pillow pressed against her stomach.

"Yes. I know I shouldn't but even you would look twice." Shane whistles down the phone.

"Damn. Sounds like one mighty fine lady." Amy smirks.

"She is."

"So what's the problem?"

"She's with Liam and last time I checked, we're getting married."

"Yeah but we all know she won't be with Liam for that long. He's playboy of the century and from what you've told me, she's too smart for that."

"Yes, but we're still engaged, lapochka."

"We are but that doesn't mean I'm going to trap you, Aims. If you want to be with her, you can. I don't mind." Amy can almost see him shrug and smiles at knowing him so well. "We both know this is a marriage of convenience, not love." Amy gasps.

"You don't love me?"

"That's now what I meant and you know it." Amy chuckles and makes a mental note to introduce Shane to Oliver.

"I know. Thank you, Shane."

"Welcome, Sweetie. Now tell me about all those ways you're going to seduce her this week." Amy rolls her eyes before replying.


	3. Chapter 2: Temptation

"_I've come to know that what we want in life is the greatest indication of who we really are."_

— Richard Paul Evans

It's 3pm when Amy pulls up at Karma's door, helping her heave her bags into Amy's car.

"Excited?" Amy asks, slamming the trunk closed. Karma nods and smiles and Amy smiles back. How could she not? The way the sunlight hits the red head's face mixed with Karma's infectious excitement melts something inside the Russian.

"Let's go."

"Lets." They both climb in the front.

It's not long before Karma finds a song on the radio to hum along to. In that moment, Amy knows she has to hear her sing, has to hear some form of passion from the little beauty. Amy also decides she loves this song and that everyone must sing a long – or try to, at least. So she does. She belts out the lyrics to _Living on a Prayer_ and she knows she's an awful singer, knows every note she hits is wrong but that smile, that smile is worth it.

After that, it's silent pretty often between the two but it's comfortable, relaxing. Karma can't remember the last time she enjoyed just being with someone and not having to really do anything.

They're both sitting quietly, now, sneaking glances at each other as they head towards their destination. Amy wants to stare, to soak in the vision of Karma's thighs that her tight shorts do little to hide or the v-neck shirt that allows more than a glimpse at Karma's cleavage. Karma smirks as she catches Amy sneaking another glance.

"Eyes on the road, princess." Amy scoffs and Karma watches the way she swallows and notices her neck, her neck which Karma wants to run her tongue along. She licks her lips and turns away from the Russian next to her.

"So, how's Liam?" Karma shrugs and keeps looking out of the window, soaking in the sun light.

"Good, I think."

"You think?"

"We broke up."

"Why?" Karma turns to face Amy who keeps looking in her direction.

"It just wasn't working out but we agreed to be friends. I was going to cancel this trip but Liam said it'd be nice to get away." Karma shrugs. "He said you liked me and wouldn't want to go alone so why not?" Amy reaches across and places her hand on top of Karma's.

"I'm sorry, golubushka."

"Don't be. I think we all know it wasn't going to last. Thanks again, by the way."

"What for?"

"For this trip. It really will be nice to go to the beach and get away for a few days. And you, you're not half bad."

"Thank you for the stunning compliment, little one." They both laugh and fall into a comfortable silence, minus the radio station blaring out love songs and pop songs, until they reach their destination.

Karma tries to force her open mouth to close.

"Wow."

"You like?"

"It's stunning." And it is.

Karma admires the modern architecture that gives off a homely, old style warmth and Karma appreciates just how luxurious some people live. The combination of stone, wood and glass was elegant, stylish, so Amy-like.

"So I have a question for you," Karma says, exiting the car. Amy nods and waits for Karma to ask. "Liam said you've never been to Austin but you're staying at that house-mansion-place and I was wondering if you owned it." Karma frowns and Amy smirks, smirks in that way which means Karma has to hold onto something to steady herself.

"It's Shane's. He's from here. It's beautiful, no? His parents gave it to him." She shrugs.

"So it'll be your marital home?" Amy sighs.

"Sort of."

They walk through the door and Karma fights the urge to just stand there and stare. She's grateful to the beautiful distraction. She doesn't want to think of Amy and her impending nuptials or how bad she wants the bride to be to be her own – at least for one night.

"We used to come here when I was younger. I try to come back as much as I can."

"It's amazing." Karma takes in the high ceilings, the light and bright rooms, the expensive furniture and blushes. She's so out of place. She doesn't belong in these kinds of places.

She belongs back in Austin with her reasonably sized house that was messier, warmer, more lived in than this stunning piece of architecture, of art.

Amy places an arm on Karma's bicep and squeezes.

"C'mon, I'll show you to your room." They walk up a stone staircase and Karma can't help taking in all the art work, the subtle details, everything. "Here you go. My room's just opposite yours." She guides Karma into a large room with a king sized bed occupying the middle of the room.

Karma walks in a dumps her bag on the floor, walking to the large doors on the other side of the room and pushing them open to a stunning view of the sea.

She gasps.

"You like? I usually take this room but I thought you'd like it." Amy stands just behind Karma, her breath ghosting over Karma's neck.

"It's beautiful."

"It is." Karma turns and is face to face with Amy. Both stand for a minute, memorising each freckle, each subtle mark and add the details to the inventory of each other they've both started to compile.

Karma breathes in the subtle, citric smell emanating from Amy and blushes under Amy's scrutinising gaze. Amy reaches out, brushing a lock of hair behind Karma's ear and stroking her cheek with her thumb.

"Hungry?" she whispers.

"Yes." Amy tilts her head for a few moments before stepping away.

"I'll just put my bag in my room and then you can follow me. Since you're my guest, I suppose I should feel you-I mean feed you." Amy coughs and blushes. Karma smiles.

"Well I suppose I am hungry for something." Amy can't take her eyes off the way Karma smirks, the way it makes her lips look even more kissable.

She turns and heads towards her room, physically stopping herself from turning around and just looking at the irresistible red head or even worse, kissing her. She can't do it, can't give into her urges and hurt Karma like that. Karma would want all or nothing and Amy couldn't give her everything, even though she wants to…maybe.

It's later and they're sitting on the beach just outside Amy's house.

Karma had gasped, yet again at the view after she'd first walked into the kitchen and saw the patio doors leading outside. They'd decided after dinner to sit and watch the sunset and that's where they'd stayed, now sitting in silence. Amy just wanted to give her memories and show Karma beautiful things that made her smile like that, made her so carefree.

Karma sits on a log and looks around. She can't help but notice how beautiful, how magical this place is; especially now when they're surrounded by darkness and the sea with nothing but firelight and moonlight to guide them. Amy being here is an added bonus.

Now they'd been here a while, Amy can't stop looking at the guitar case resting not far from Karma. She'd give anything to hear Karma play, to hear Karma sing. If she sounds half as good as her talking voice when she sings, Amy knows she'll be mesmerised.

She looks at Karma and notices how the light hits her face, softening Karma, illuminating her. The smell of fire and sea combine and Amy feels _something_ she cannot name, something she's never really felt before.

In this moment, everything is simple, perfect, relaxing.

They sit in silence for a while until, eventually, curiosity wins out and Amy asks.

"Why don't you play something?" Amy nods her head towards the guitar case and Karma looks at it for a few moments. Karma picks at the imaginary lint on her dress and her skin begins to heat up, not from the fire or weather, but from something else, something she doesn't want to discuss or think about. A blush colours her skin and luckily for her, Amy doesn't notice in the darkness.

"I'm er-I'm not the best but I guess, I guess I could play something." She shakes the nerves away and picks up her trusty, black, acoustic guitar.

Amy watches in silence and smiles gently. She feels special. It's clear Karma won't play for anyone and she wonders why that is. Why won't the little beauty share her gifts with the world?

Karma's fingers ghost over the strings. She plays some Spanish sounding melody that somehow fits the mood, making everything feel more…magical. She smiles and Amy notices how the tension leaves, how her face softens and she looks at ease in a way Amy has never seen. Karma closes her eyes and Amy cannot take her eyes off of her.

"Why don't you sing?" Amy whispers, afraid anything louder will shatter the moment.

"Sing? I can't."

"Yes you can." Amy walks over from sitting opposite Karma to sit next to her. She nudges Karma's arm with her shoulder and Karma looks down, smiling still. Amy's close enough to notice her blush now and her smirk turns to a soft, indulgent smile. "You don't have to, if you really don't want to." Amy shrugs. "But I bet you have a beautiful voice." Karma thinks about it for a few moments, thinks over whether she wants the Russian goddess to hear her sing.

"Okay but you have to close your eyes. And promise not to laugh," Karma says after deciding Amy's smile would be worth then possible embarrassment.

"Promise," Amy says, obediently closing her eyes and that's when she hears, that's when the most beautiful voice she's ever heard fills the silence.

_Tell me that you turned down the man_

_Who asked for your hand_

_'Cause you're waiting for me_

_And I know, you're gonna be away a while_

_But I've got no plans at all to leave_

_And would you take away my hopes and dreams?_

_Just stay with me_

Amy opens her eyes and soaks in the vision of Karma. There's a slight breeze rustling her red hair and she's swaying slightly to the beat. Her eyes are closed and Amy's grateful for it. Now she can look and stare and memorise this perfect moment.

Karma's voice is the perfect amount of husk, of softness, of high and low. It washes over Amy and creates goosebumps on her skin.

_All my senses come to life_

_While I'm stumbling home as drunk as I_

_Have ever been and I'll never leave again_

_'Cause you are the only one_

_And all my friends have gone to find_

_Another place to let their hearts collide_

_Just promise me, you'll never leave again_

_'Cause you are the only one_

_Take my hand and my_

_Heart and soul, I will_

_Only have these eyes for you_

_And you know, everything changes but_

_We'll be strangers if, we see this through_

_You could stay within these walls and bleed_

_But just stay with me_

_All my senses come to life_

_While I'm stumbling home as drunk as I_

_Have ever been and I'll never leave again_

_'Cause you are the only one_

_And all my friends have gone to find_

_Another place to let their hearts collide_

_Just promise me, you'll always be a friend_

_'Cause you are the only one_

_I'm stumbling off drunk, getting myself lost_

_I am so gone, so tell me the way home_

_I listen to sad songs, singing about love_

_And where it goes wrong?_

Amy shakes herself out of her Karma induced trance when she notices the frown marring her lastochka's features.

_All my senses come to life_

_While I'm stumbling home as drunk as I_

_Have ever been and I'll never leave again_

_Cause you are the only one_

_And all my friends have gone to find_

_Another place to let their hearts collide_

_Just promise me, you'll always be a friend_

_'Cause you are the only one_

It's silent for a few moments. Karma keeps her eyes closed, fearing Amy's response and Amy is too stunned to form words, yet.

"That was-that was incredible." Karma blushes and lets out a breath she's been holding. Amy places her hand on Karma's face, stroking her cheek. "You're incredible," she whispers.

"Th-Thank you."

Amy reaches over and kisses her cheek. Karma closes her eyes and smiles. She imagines what it would be like to be with Amy, to spend the night loving the Russian beauty. She blushes and feels an ache building up inside of her. This must be what want, what need feels like. It's throbbing, insistent. It turns you inside out and makes your skin crawl for _their_ touch.

Amy pulls away and rests her forehead against Karma's, both with eyes closed.

"Why're you so perfect?"

"Because I'm me and I'm the perfect height, princess." They smile. Amy knows she needs to stop. She can't have Karma and lose her and she will lose her. Karma's not the kind of girl to stay quiet, to stay hidden. It wouldn't be fair to ask it of her but God Amy wants to. She takes a deep breath and stands up, hand outstretched to Karma.

"It's late. We should get inside."

"Okay." And Karma looks up from under her eye lashes again, and her skin feels so soft and she looks so good. And Amy helps her up before using every ounce of strength to turn her back and walk away. Karma frowns but dutifully follows, wrapping her arms around herself.

They both sleep restlessly that night, aware of each other being just across the hall and no one else being there to stop them.

Karma doesn't know what's going on, doesn't know why Amy goes from being so warm and inviting to so distant. She wonders if she's being too obvious, if Amy has noticed her growing crush and is trying to let her down gently. But if that's so, Amy really needs to stop touching Karma, stop pulling her in to push her away again. Dammit, it's Amy's fault. They both just need distance. Yes, distance is what they need. At least, that's what Karma tries to fool herself into thinking.

Amy lies there, itching to walk into Karma's room and touch and love and be with her golubushka. It's that innocence, those big eyes, the soft skin that drives her crazy for just a taste, just a night with her.

But she can't do it. Can't let Karma get hurt. Can't let anyone know, really know what's going on with her arrangement with Shane. What if she lets her down? What if she tells people that Amy's marriage isn't true, not in hers or Shane's hearts? Oh, her parents wouldn't care about that. No. They'd only care what others think of Amy's marriage. She has duties to fulfil and she can't let anyone get in the way of that. Even if they're perfect, and lovely, and so beautiful it hurts.

Amy turns away from the door she's been facing and forces herself to get some rest. Thinking about things that can never be doesn't help anyone.

It's in the morning, as she walks down the stairs that Amy's resolve begins to crumble once again. She hears Karma's moving around her kitchen, preparing delicious smelling things for breakfast and smiles. She knew Karma would be the home maker, the sweetheart that would cook breakfast for anyone in the house.

She heads towards the kitchen and that's what breaks her, what throws her mind into fantasy land. When Amy sees her, really sees her, her mind goes blank for a few moments as she registers the sight. Karma's wearing a red silk dressing gown that stops mid-thigh and, like a beacon, she draws every single one of Amy's senses to her. She can't stop looking, can't stop staring at the red head.

Amy stops, frozen in the door way and just watches. Watches Karma move so gracefully, watches the way she moves and how the silk shifts like the sea. It rolls over her skin, hiding and showing treasures of Karma's flesh that Amy really wants to run her lips over.

She's humming a tune Amy's never heard before but the husky tone sends Amy's body into over drive. She never knew, never thought that such a domesticated sight could do this to somebody.

Karma jumps as she turns around and stop the Russian beauty standing there watching her. She flushes and stumbles over her words.

"Oh, I-I didn't know you were there. Pancakes. I mean, you do like pancakes right? I'm doing some eggs and bacon and things as well, if you don't. I didn't know what you liked for breakfast so." Karma shrugs. "And pancakes are my favourite and my nana says everyone has to like pancakes so…yeah." Amy smirks and Karma turns around.

Distance, that's what they need, Karma reminds herself. But God that smirk, the adorable messiness to Amy's hair all make Karma smile, tenderly. Amy can be adorable, sometimes.

"It all smells good. Whatever you're cooking is fine by me. I eat everything except peanuts." Amy walks over and stands side by side with Karma. They sneak glances at each other as Karma finishes up breakfast and Amy readies two cups of coffee for them both.

"How'd you take your coffee?"

"Cream, two sugars." Amy crinkles her nose and Karma smiles after catching her. "What? Not to your taste?"

"No. I'm Russian, we're brave. I take my coffee black, no sugar in the mornings."

"Wow. Now that's disgusting."

"Yes but it wakes you up, quickly, milaya moya."

"What does that mean?" Karma asks, plating up the last of the food.

"Hmm?"

"You sometimes call me things in Russian and I never know what they mean."

"Google it." Amy winks and heads to the dining table, the one with the perfect view of the sea. Karma frowns but follows, plates in hand. Together they move everything to the table, Karma still frowning. They sit and Amy places a hand on top of Karma's. "Little one, they mean nothing bad but I have to keep my air of mystery now, don't I?" They smile at each other and Karma lightly chuckles. Amy's eyes zero in on the strip of flesh between Karma's breasts that becomes visible. She looks away, hoping Karma didn't see but the image is seared into her brain. Her hands almost shake with the need to run themselves over the sensitive skin, to slip lower and stroke each millimetre of flesh.

"Whatever you say, blondie, whatever you say." They begin eating, Amy throwing her thoughts aside and stacking her plate up high. Karma watches in amazement.

"What?"

"You're going to eat all that?"

"Yes. I have to keep my energy up, right?" She winks again and Karma would know she was blushing, even without the rapid warmth of her skin alerting her. Amy smiles and just looks at Karma in all her adorable glory. She can feel her heartbeat speeding up but ignores it.

"So why don't you eat peanuts?"

"Allergy."

"Oh."

"Yeah. My mother was so scared when I was younger. My uncle, he'd come back from America and told us about peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Me and Lauren wanted to try it and so we did but as you can imagine, it didn't turn out well for me. I got rushed to the hospital. I've never seen my uncle come close to crying other than then. He was so scared but." Amy shrugs. "The doctors fixed me up and ever since then, no peanut butter. I can tell you, though, from what I can remember, it tastes delicious."

"Yeah, it does. I love it."

"Lucky you."

"Yeah, sorry." Karma looks sheepishly down to her plate. "I don't have any allergies. Well, any that I know of so I guess I'm really lucky."

"You are. But anyway, the food is delicious, little one." Karma rolls her eyes.

"Good." Amy smiles and swallows down another bite. Karma looks out of the window to the beautiful view of the sea and sand and sunshine and peacefulness, trying to avoid staring at the woman sitting across from her.

They find themselves back on the beach front that afternoon, basking in the summer sun. Of course, Karma had to supply Amy's body with a thick layer of sunscreen to protect that lovely skin of hers. Now they're lying, side by side in nothing but their bathing suits. Amy's a deep blue, Karma's a dark black.

Amy pushes her sunglasses up a little higher and gives Karma's body the once over for the umpteenth time today.

"Stop staring," Karma says, opening her eyes and catching sight of the familiar smirk that heats up her skin a little more.

"Just making sure you're not getting burnt, sunshine." Karma scoffs and rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, right."

"And I meant it, black really does suit you." Amy leans across and pulls one of the straps on Karma's bikini top. Karma smacks her hand away.

"Stop that." Karma raises an eyebrow and Amy just smiles in response. "And if I didn't know better, I'd say you were trying to get me out of this." She waves her hand down her body and Amy's eyes follow the same path.

Amy looks up and stares at Karma's face for a few moments, torn between giving in and kissing her or turning away and keeping this…friendship safe.

**A/N:**

**I'm going to set an update schedule for my two Karmy fanfics. University is becoming quite busy and I have all these other things to do but I will be updating each story at least once a week.**

**I'm so glad you guys are enjoying this story thus far.**

**- A**


	4. Chapter 3: I Only Wanna Be With You

"_To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."_

― _Oscar Wilde_

"Maybe I do."

"Huh?" Karma's mind blanks at the implication. Amy shifts closer, pressing her front against Karma's side. They both shiver at the contact. Amy's voice lowers to a husky groan as she leans in to whisper in Karma's ear.

"Maybe I do want you out of this." She runs her hand across Karma's stomach and up her side, almost cupping one of Karma's breasts but not quite. "Maybe I want you naked and writhing and underneath me, golubushka. Maybe I want to bury my fingers so deep inside you, nobody will ever come lose to touching you so deep."

"Amy," Karma moans, closing her eyes and shaking off the thoughts of her giving in to temptation. Her skin is flushed and her breathing is heavy. "Amy, we can't." She pushes Amy's shoulder – Karma instantly misses the contact, the way Amy's skin felt so good against hers. Amy pulls away a little, frown in place.

"I know but that doesn't mean I don't want it."

"I know." Karma reaches up and strokes Amy's cheek with her thumb. Amy closes her eyes and leans in to the touch "I know." Amy opens her eyes and Karma's breath catches as Amy's eyes lock on her. "But you're getting married and I can't, I won't do one night stands. I'm sorry."

"No, no. It's okay." Amy guides Karma's wrists so they wrap around her and pulls her in close, burying her nose in the little beauties hair.

Karma begins to softly cry. Her body aches for Amy, even though it hasn't even been a full week since they met. She always thought people in books, in movies, in songs were lying or being stupid when they instantly wanted somebody so much but now she knows the truth, now she knows how painful it is to hold back when all that you want is just…there.

"It's okay, little love."

"But it's not. I want you, I want you so much." Amy can't help the smirk from appearing on her face.

"You know, I've spoken to Shane about you." Karma leans back and Amy's heart breaks at the sight of her tear streaked face. Amy wipes away the tears and debates whether she should tell her, tell her about this arrangement, about how Karma can have Amy as long as nobody else knows but she already knows Karma's response. She knows Karma can't be hidden, that's not who she is.

"What did you say?"

"The truth; That I've met this beautiful little stunner who I know will be a firecracker in my bed." Amy winks, tapping her on the nose and Karma scoffs, rolling her eyes.

"So that's all you want me for? My body?" Amy's soft laughter stops and she tilts her head.

"If that's all I wanted, I wouldn't be here trying to make you feel better, I wouldn't be holding myself back from everything I want to do to you."

"Amy."

"How good would it feel to have your lips on mine?" Amy runs her thumb over Karma's lips and closes her eyes, imagining what a kiss from Karma would be like. She takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I just—" She looks away. "You're quite irresistible to me, milaya moya."

"But you're getting married." Amy looks down and Karma keeps her eyes on Amy, determined to find out why she's doing this, why's she getting married if she doesn't want it.

"I am."

"Why?" Amy pulls away and they both lie on their sides, facing each other.

"It's complicated."

"I'm all ears, princess."

"Family." Karma frowns. "It's not easy to be like this, to be like me where I'm from." Karma's frown deepens.

"So you're marrying Shane for your family? Just to hide what you are?" Karma begins to stand up and Amy grabs her hand, stopping her from stomping away.

"It's the way things have to be," Amy pleads.

"And what about Shane? How does he feel about being in a loveless marriage? And you? Are you going to keep hiding yourself, keep stopping yourself just for them?"

"It's not like that, golubushka."

"Stop calling me that and everything else you've been calling me. Just stop it."

"Karma," she sighs. "Karma please, just listen." They're both standing, Amy facing Karma's back. Karma takes a deep breath, preparing herself to listen. How can Amy do this? How can she be such a coward? Amy sighs before continuing on. "He knows about how I feel." Karma turns to face her. "Shane knows because he doesn't love me, either. He's gay but his family won't accept that either." Karma scoffs.

"So what? You're both cowards that would rather hide?"

"Do you have any idea what it's like?" Karma opens her mouth to respond but Amy doesn't allow her time to speak. "Do you have any idea what it's like to have to hide yourself, to stop yourself from doing the things that make you happy just so you have a family? Just so you can live safely in your own country?"

"Amy." Karma reaches out but Amy pulls away and furiously wipes away some of the tears that are falling.

"No. I'm sorry that I seem like such a coward to you, that Shane does, too but we'd lose everything. Do you know what that's like, Karma?" She spits out before turning and walking away. Karma runs to catch up, tears in her own eyes. Karma's always been reckless, saying things, reacting to things before she has a chance to think things through but even she knows she's messed up big time, here.

Karma reaches Amy, tugging on her wrist just as she reaches the door to the house and forcing Amy to face her. She wipes away some of her tears, angry at herself for crying. She shouldn't be, she has no right to cry. Her life has been easy in comparison. Sure she has to please her parents by dating men but she knows, deep down she knows that even though it would hurt them, they'd find a way to accept the person she loves, regardless of gender.

She takes in the sight of Amy in tears and something in her stomach twists and shifts until it's pressing against her heart.

"I-I'—" Karma looks around as if that could help her find the right words to say. "I'm sorry." The weight of everything she doesn't understand hits Karma with those words. "I don't understand any of it and I'm just-I'm sorry." Amy hugs Karma and the guilt eats away at her even more for it. She should be the one comforting Amy but she isn't, she isn't because she's childish and stupid and weak but God, God does she want this woman so badly right now. Even after arguing, even after being wrongfully ashamed of her, she still just wants her, still wants to feel her body, wants to feel everything close because she's so beautiful, so perfect, so unattainable.

It all hurts. They both collapse into a heap on the floor, holding each other close and crying.

It's Karma that pulls away first. Something inside of her took over when they both broke together. Amy's there, watching Karma with her red rimmed eyes and her mussed up hair that makes her look so adorable and Karma just can't stop herself, can't fight it. She shouldn't do this, she knows it's a bad idea but there's a side that's winning the battle inside of her and that's the side urging her to kiss Amy's lips, to just get a taste of what she wants before she lets it go.

She leans forward, pressing her lips against Amy's and feels how soft and yet firm they are. Amy kisses back and with every subtle movement, something inside of Karma breaks and she knows, she knows that this is her first kiss. This is her first real kiss where everything inside of her aches for more and she shivers with need. Even the salty taste of tears is perfect in this moment.

Karma whimpers as she grants Amy's tongue access to her mouth. She runs her hands up Amy's sides and moans into the Russian's mouth. It just feels so good, so delicious to taste her lips, to feel her flesh under her touch.

Amy leans back until she's on her back with Karma on top of her, kissing her. Again and again and again until the tears are long gone and the warmth of being pressed against each other replaces everything, every thought that says this is wrong, every thought about what this means, everything leaves until it is just them.

Karma's hands shake and Amy grabs a hold of them, intertwining their fingers. Amy will never forget the taste of Karma, the feel of her and how right this moment is. Karma shifts and her hips press against Amy and something in Amy awakens. Amy's skin heats up, a steady pulsing emanates from Karma's lips and through Amy's body until she breaks and grabs hold of Karma's hips, pulling them closer again and again and grinding her hips against Karma.

Karma moans as she pulls away and rests her forehead on Amy's.

"Woah," Karma says.

"I know."

"That was—"

"I know." Amy leans forward for another kiss and they both smile. "Hungry?"

"Starving," Karma says, winking.

"Then let's go get some food in you golu-Karma." Amy offers her hand and Karma takes it, squeezing lightly.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

"Of course." Amy begins walking into the kitchen, Karma follows and wraps an arm around Amy's waist, leaning up to whisper:

"I really like it when you call me those Russian names, princess." Amy shivers and Karma smirks.

"Good, because I like calling you them, golubushka."

They both smile


	5. Chapter 4: Burn

_'Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.' _

– Ann Landers

It's torture.

It's torture for them to be lying next to each other, exchanging body heat and not being able to touch like they want to. Why can't they touch like they want to? Karma knows Amy is betrothed to another but she wants her so bad and Shawn knows, Shawn knows that Amy doesn't love him so it's not wrong, is it?

But it is.

It is in her heart because she would never be able to forget each kiss, each touch, each second and she'd spend her life longing for more, more than Amy can give.

Karma shifts once again, trying to shake off the thoughts of everything she wants to do to Amy. Amy who's so soft, so beautiful, so perfect. Karma wants to run her tongue along each contour of her body and taste the Russian in every way imaginable. She almost groans aloud at the thought.

"You okay?" Amy whispers, turning to face Karma.

"I'm fine, princess. I just can't sleep."

"I know the feeling." They both roll over, facing each other on their sides. Amy rests her head on her hands and smiles at the sight of Karma bathed in moonlight. Karma smiles back until they're both laughing for no other reason than the happiness of the moment. "You're so beautiful," she says, gently tucking a lock of hair behind Karma's ear.

"So are you."

"Mhmm."

Karma can't resist anymore. Her eyes lock onto Amy's lips until they flick up to meet Amy's eyes as their mouths meet.

Divine.

That's how it feels to kiss Amy. That's how it feels when Amy's hands slip under her shirt and begin stroking Karma's stomach over and over again and Karma can't help imagining those hands, those fingers stroking somewhere else.

Amy moves forward, pressing their bodies together as she wraps her hand around Karma's hips.

Nothing feels like this. Nothing feels as good as touching her golubushka, her love, her Karma. That's how Amy thinks of her now and just the thought of somebody else kissing, somebody else loving Karma makes Amy want to cry.

"Let's dance," she says, climbing out of the bed and walking over to a docking station Karma never noticed before.

As soon as Amy's satisfied with the song and the volume, she walks back to Karma and holds her hand out.

"May I have this dance?" Karma tilts her head in response and tries to keep the laughter that's consuming her in.

Soon, they're swaying from side to side, thoroughly enjoying the feel of their bodies pressed against each other. Karma's never been held like this and Amy's never held someone like this, so gentle, so close, so loving. Karma rests her on Amy's shoulder and takes a deep breath, everything but the happiness of the moment exhaling with her.

The music continues and so do they. Moonlight creating a spotlight for their swaying shadows.

They both know that this can't last, that whatever they're doing must come to an end. But Amy can't stop herself from wanting her so badly. Why not have tonight? Why not have these next few days? Why not have a taste?

Because it'll break their hearts, Karma thinks. _'A taste of honey's worse than none at all.'_ She remembers this song from her childhood well. It sums up her emotions perfectly. How could she survive never having more than this again?

Something steels inside of Amy and Karma can almost see it happen. She doesn't have time to ask questions before Amy kisses her neck, across her jaw and down her neck and with that, the doubts, the fear, the sadness leave them both. Karma walks backwards to the bed and lies on her back at the push of Amy's insistent hands and before she knows it, her shirt is firmly in Amy's grasp. She doesn't know if it's a good or bad thing that she sleeps without her bra on.

"So perfect," Amy says, leaning back and drinking in Karma's naked chest.

Good. Definitely a good thing.

She runs her fingers across Karma's breasts before using her thumb to stroke them, admiring how soft, how delicate Karma's skin feels under her touch.

Amy can't resist.

She lowers her mouth and retraces her hands movements with her lips. The warmth of her tongue causes Karma to moan, to pull at the blonde's hair and shift her hips; the pulsing between Karma's thighs getting stronger and stronger by the second.

"Don't stop," she whispers between gasps and Amy doesn't. She kisses more and more and at some point, her hands help Karma to wiggle out of her shorts, out of her underwear. She begins kissing lower, dipping into the valley of Karma's belly button and heading further south. "No," Karma says, gently pulling Amy's head, Amy's lips away from her flesh.

"What's wrong?" Amy frowns and pleads for Karma not to be having second thoughts, not now. Now she needs to love Karma, to taste her, to feel her, to hear her, to see her in ecstasy. Now they both need to take what they want.

But Amy knows. Amy knows that all Karma has to do is show one moment of doubt and that would be it. They'd never get to see what this could have been.

"You. Clothes off, now." Amy takes a deep breath at her demanding tone and shimmies out of her pyjamas, her usual smirk wiped from her face and replaced with a look of concentration.

Neither want to mess this up, their one chance at having each other.

"Your wish is my command," she says, throwing her clothes into a pile on the floor before climbing back onto the bed and lying on top of Karma.

"You are, y'know?"

"Hmm?"

"Every wish I've ever wanted, you've granted." They both moan as their skin comes into contact, each inch of their flesh gliding across each other's. Karma's husky, growling tone that Amy's ever heard her use before sends shivers down her spine.

She smiles wickedly at Karma, Karma who's lying there with her eyes closed and a small grin on her face.

"You feel so good, lastochka." Karma moans again in response as Amy moves her body against Karma's, creating the most delicious friction either of them have felt.

Maybe it's because she shouldn't, maybe it's because Karma is so amazing, maybe it's because she'll never have this again but Amy has never felt so turned on, so tempted and close to the edge in her life.

Karma writhes and whimpers and Amy continues her assault: Amy's soft skin moving up and down against her own, Amy's centre rubbing over hers and winding the coil inside of her tighter and tighter.

Karma growls and it's the most animalistic sound she's ever made.

"Why're you stopping?" she asks. Amy pulls back in response, smirk in place and runs her fingers down Karma's side.

"I have other plans for you, my love." She leans forwards and kisses Karma, sweetly, over and over again. Her lips, her nose, her cheeks, her lips again.

Karma almost screams in pleasure as Amy plunges two fingers inside of her, now in time with each kiss. The wet sound of her digits moving in and out of Karma and Karma's deep breathing creates a lullaby Amy wishes she'd found sooner and could keep for longer.

"You're so perfect."

"So are you," Karma breathes out. Her mind lost to the feel of Amy against her. She's never felt this, never felt so alive, so carefree, so…light.

Amy plunges in and out, over and over, and Karma has never felt touched so deeply, branded so pleasurably.

Everything inside of her is winding tighter and tighter, begging for something to break, to release the tension that's so delicious and overwhelming.

And with a deep, ferocious kiss from Amy, the dam breaks and Karma moans in pleasure. Everything inside of her quivering as Amy relentless hits her mark over and over again.

"Stop," Karma whispers and Amy listens, watching Karma's heaving chest and grinning at what she could do to Karma. "That…That was incredible."

"You're telling me, golubushka." Karma's panting fills the silence and Amy is mesmerised into silence. The way Karma threw her head back, the veins in her neck looking decidedly kissable. The way she moaned, her throaty tone ricocheting off the walls and touching something inside of Amy.

Everything about this girl has Amy hooked and she knows, she knows that both of their hearts will be broken, now.

"What are you thinking?" Karma asks, brushing Amy's hair away from her eyes and behind her ear. Karma leans forward and kisses her forehead. Amy closes her eyes and tries not to think of anything but now.

"Nothing important, my love." Amy kisses Karma's lips again and again. She could never get enough of doing this. Karma sighs and pulls back.

"It's your turn, princess." She reaches down to touch Amy but Amy stops her.

"No, not now." Karma frowns. "Later. We have all night. For now, just let me hold you." She wraps her arms around Karma and Karma snuggles in, head resting under Amy's chin and on her chest.

"Why didn't I find you sooner?"

"Because then you'd be Russian." They smile into the darkness and it's not long before sleep claims them both, they're worn out bodies pleasantly tired and satiated for now.

Karma's the first to wake, fear lighting up her veins and making her want to run, to get away and burn this energy inside of her until she's too tired to care, to think.

The moonlight is still shining into the room, darkness still blanketing them both.

Karma takes a few moments to just look at the Russian below her. The way her face looks so relaxed, the way her mouth is slightly open as she sleeps, the way she looks so innocent.

Amy's beautiful, perfection and not hers. She can never be hers. She tries to push down the tears, the burning ache that wants to sear her throat until she screams in pain.

She tries to manoeuvre out of Amy's grasp without waking her but it doesn't seem possible. Amy's hold on Karma is too tight for her to break free without waking her, and she's not sure she's ready to face the girl of her dreams, yet.

But what can she do?

She lies there, focusing on her breathing, on the shadows outside the window, on anything but how they shouldn't have done this, they shouldn't have made everything worse, everything hurt more than it was going to.

"What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" Karma jumps at the sound of Amy's voice breaking the silence. The covers slip and reveal her chest and Amy can't take her eyes off of her.

Karma shivers and pulls the blanket back into place.

"Nothing." Amy frowns and wraps her arms around Karma, a little tighter.

"Golubushka, what's wrong?"

"Everything." Amy kisses her forehead and holds Karma as tight as she can as Karma's tears run onto Amy's chest.

"Shh, my love. Everything will be okay. I don't know how, I don't when but it will be."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do. I do because I know you'll always have me and I'd do anything for you."

"Anything but actually be with me." Karma knows, she knows she shouldn't say things like that, that it's not fair but she can't stop the words from leaving her.

She pulls away and Amy lets her.

"It's not that simple."

"I know. It-It doesn't even matter."

"Karma," Amy calls, trying to get her attention as she picks up her clothing from the floor. Amy throws the covers off of her and reaches out for Karma's hand. "Karma, stop."

"No," she wipes her face. "I-I think it's best I go to a different room."

"Karma, don't be like this."

"Be like what? Reasonable. We shouldn't have done this, we both know it." The redhead begins putting her clothing on and Amy watching for a few seconds, frown in place.

"Do you think we could have stopped it? This was always going to happen, golubushka, don't you see that?" Amy holds Karma's chin and forces Karma to stop her movements and look at her.

"No. We should have more control—"

"Karma—"

"No. This wasn't supposed to happen. I was supposed to fall in love with someone I could live my life with–that would want to be with me. This-This was just a mistake. A mistake that can't happen again," she shouts, pulling away from Amy and tugging her clothing back on.

"A mistake?"

"Yes." Amy stares for a few moments before turning away and crawling back under the covers.

Karma wants to join her, to lie next to her and hold her but she can't. One of them needs to be strong, needs to end this before it hurts even more than it already does. She makes sure she has everything before whispering: "I'm sorry" as she walks towards the door.

"Me too," Amy whispers just as Karma closes the door behind her and both of them don't try to stop the tears.

**A/N So very sorry about the delay! Life -.-**


End file.
